Setting up this blog was easy peasy. What to put on the blog? Well, that was a stumbling block that was still pissing me off. There are a few stories- some finished, some not- that have been sitting on my Facebook account that I intend to move over here, but I wanted to start with something fresh. I was struggling with which story to begin my new adventure with when it struck me that I was currently living out my freshest story to date.
At first I thought this would be a four or five part story that would shake the cobwebs and rust a bit and allow me to get the old juices flowing. It turned into something more than I bargained on.
The story had to start with why I am doing this, which meant starting with why I quit my job. The story took on a life of its own as I peeled back each layer of the onion. I was delving deeper and deeper into the story and was heading down a path with benchmarks that only a few people knew about. It seemed like the perfect time to come completely clean with everyone about my bouts with depression. Along with that mini-revelation it was important to me to show why it happened.
It was necessary to me to make it clear that my depression was a direct result of my unhappiness with my job. The mental anguish I felt there was still having an effect on me and it was my fervent hope that airing things out would assuage at least some of the pain.
Each part was written and published on consecutive days at first as the story seemed to flow through my fingers and onto the keyboard. Each day I shared a link to the new chapters on social media and thought of another way to get more people to look at this blog. More people were reading, liking, and commenting on my stuff each day: friends, family, former coworkers, and even bloggers here on WordPress.
One of the more gratifying comments I heard came from two former coworkers. The first one sent me a message to let me know they were reading my blog. The coworker shared that they and the others still at work had been warned against liking or commenting on my writings on social media. The other coworker, who quit before I did, corroborated this when they shared with me that a little bird had told them the same thing. This information was not a shock to me. It was a little satisfying to apparently get under someone’s skin, though I never heard who it was.
The most gratifying comments have been the ones voicing support and admiration for what I’ve done. Well read friends are telling me how much they like what I’ve written so far. Others are sharing with me their admiration of the courage it took to quit my job at this stage of life.
The most eye-opening comment to date was one shared with me by my mom and one of my best friends. Within a few days of each other they told me that this entire process seems to have been cathartic for me. I had never considered that until they mentioned it. They were right.
This four or five part story turned into a twelve part cleansing of my mental palate. It allowed me to get those demons off my chest.
Today I am finally and truly free to move on.